My Thoughts on My Debt
So it turned out that H cooked at my place last night so I didn’t have to supply the food…but I sorta did anyway, what with bread I’d already baked and party mix that I made on Monday. Anyway, it was fun.
It’s been nearly a year since I began reading all these personal finance blogs. Some are instructional in nature, while others are similar to mine: just updating on our own financial lives and giving tips when we come across them. These are the ones that I like best: just regular people trying to get out of debt.
What I’ve been noticing lately is how my outlook has changed in the past year. Prior to all this reading, I never felt hampered by my car loan and student loans. I didn’t like them, of course, but I felt like it was normal to have these kind of payments going out each month. I had the desire to pay them off early if I could, but I wasn’t actually doing anything towards that end–I simply paid everything due each month. I was going around without concern.
Once I started reading, though, I started feeling like I had to get rid of the debt as soon as possible. I’m constantly trying to find ways to save money or get a little extra money, feeling guilty when I don’t do something as cheaply as possible, etc. Frankly, I’m exhausted and my debt has become a weight instead of a nuisance. And my debt is so managable! I pay $262.72 every month. There are people that would LOVE to only have to pay that each month to stay afloat.
I’m not always exhausted, though. Some days I get really excited, whether it’s seeing my amount of debt lessen or saving a few bucks on something at the grocery store. I just sort of miss not worrying about things so much.
But that’s today. For the rest of this month I’m going to work on my 2009 goals because I’ll feel brighter everytime that I accomplish something…especially the things that get me more organized / neater, etc.
My Thoughts on Gifts, Gift Cards, and Gift Receipts
Sorry for the lack of updates! Recently, I’ve been reading a lot of online stories and real books and just generally doing things that take me away from the blog. I’ve been mostly keeping up with the blogs in my blogroll even though I rarely comment on them, so I haven’t forgotten about you all.
On Saturday morning I went to a nearby Kohl’s to get some picture frames for some of the gifts that I’m giving. I should have known that I’d get into trouble. By trouble, I mean that I bought stuff for me, too. Along with the three 4″ x 6″ frames, I picked up a set of 10 frames of assorted sizes for $20. They all match AND they match the color of my living room / dining room furniture, so it’ll be perfect to put up and fill up some blank wall space. The other thing I picked up for myself is a set of two wall sconces for about $17.50. I want these to go on either side of my framed / matted movie poster of The Quiet Man (my favorite movie); I’ve wanted to get matching sconces like this pretty much since I moved in about fifteen months ago, but either never had the money or never found something that I liked enough. Finally I found these! Now, I probably shouldn’t have bought them since my family’s rule (and mine) has always been not to buy things for ourselves between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I broke the rule last year, too, because I desperately needed dress pants that fit me, but otherwise I’ve been good over the years. Honestly, though, I picked it up and refused to have the argument with myself. If I regret it, I can return it…and the set of frames.
I’d have to go back to my last posts to be sure, but I think that I’m around $125 for presents so far. I still need to pick up a couple small things for my parents and B, and I need to get containers for the cookies that I’m baking for people. Oh, and some bottles of wine. And the thing for RC. I won’t see them until after New Years’, though, so I can wait on that. Hmm. Definitely not done shopping.
I got a $50 Macy’s gift card from one of my bosses, so I’m going to try to use that for my mom’s gift when I go shopping tonight. I know that some people really try to use gift cards to buy things for themselves and I do, sometimes. Mostly I tend to see gift cards as money that I can spend at that store whenever I happen to go there–if it’s for me, great, but if it’s for someone else, even better. Part of my purchase at Kohl’s this weekend was spent with store credit that I had from a gift return from last Christmas. My mom picked out the ugliest pajamas that I knew I’d never wear. Ew.
Speaking of receiving gifts that one will never use, my grandmother is terrible about letting us return stuff. Last Christmas she ALSO gave me pajamas that I knew I’d never wear. Not only were they ugly, but they were WAY too big for me. I think she thinks I weigh 100 lbs. more than I do. I told her nicely that they didn’t fit because I wear a size small…and in this brand even an extra-small. She told me that they were supposed to be big (as to be more comfortable??). I didn’t mention that I can’t sleep in things that are too large for me because they get too twisted up (shoot, I can’t even sleep if I roll my back onto my own blankets—the princess and the pea has nothing on me). Anyway, instead of just telling me where she got them so that I could return them (I’d have been happy with store credit, even), she asked me to give them to her and she’d return them. Well, then I felt awful, putting her to extra trouble, but I was hoping that they wouldn’t have anything in my size to exchange them for. And I was halfway right. I eventually got the pajamas in a size small, but they were still too big. And I still didn’t like them. You know what, though? Still have them. I wore the pajama pants exactly one time and it was because all my other pants were dirty. One time my grandmother gave my mom two left-footed slippers; when Mom told her that they didn’t fit, my grandmother said snippily that they HAD to fit because Mom and my aunt wore the same size and my aunt’s fit. My mom gave up trying to get them changed and my dad later joked that my aunt probably got two right-footed slippers, but didn’t want to complain.
This is why I always include a gift receipt whenever I purchase clothing for people or almost anything else when I buy in a store. If someone doesn’t like what I get them, I don’t really want to know about it, but I want them to get something they’d like better.
Alright, internet pals. I probably won’t be updating until I get back from Connecticut next week (traveling up there on Boxing Day to see B’s family). If you get bored, you can click over to one of the Personal Finance blogs on my blogroll, or the non-PF blogs below that, including my Redskin Letters blog. Yes, I have a second blog; it is fairly comical, so please do not take anything in it seriously. Also, I’m rude to all commenters (comically?), so if you comment, don’t be surprised if I’m bitchy. It’s all for fun. But please don’t mention THIS blog if you do comment there. My real life pals don’t know about this one.
Anyway, please have a very merry Christmas (or Hanukah) and I’ll be back soon!!!!
My Butterscotch Cookies
So I can do one thing well: bake butterscotch cookies from scratch. I found the recipe on a website a long time ago and baked them up. I thought that they were okay, but my family absolutely loves them. I get remarks from people all the time saying that they never really cared for butterscotch cookies before, but they love mine. This obviously gives me a big head.
Anyway, one of my pals is having a non-traditional Thanksgiving feast on Wednesday evening, where everyone is supposed to bring something that you wouldn’t find on the Thanksgiving table. I’m not a cook so I decided not to try to cook something up and mess it up. Instead, I’m going to bake my cookies (and bake tons of them) and bring them over.
I don’t have the recipe memorized or I’d post it here right now (if I think of it or get requests I’ll do it later), but I do know that it requires just basic ingredients, shortening, and then butterscotch chips, so all I’ll have to buy are the chips (I hope!)…and maybe shortening. In any case, it should be a cheap thing to make AND it’s tasty. I guess that’s what I’ll be doing on Tuesday evening!
Which leads to another thing. I was considering taking Wednesday off from work because Thanksgiving traffic is NUTS in DC from about 10am on Wednesday to late on Thursday…before it begins again for Black Friday. I didn’t want to be stuck in it, but then I found out that B is working until 4pm in DC that day. If I go to work, I’ll be able to pick him up when he gets off the Pentagon City Mall Metro at 4:30. Our friends’ thing is at 6pm in Alexandria, but I don’t know how long it’ll take to get there in the traffic. I’d assume less than an hour and a half, though. If I don’t work, though, I’d still have to drive out somewhere to pick him up, so I won’t avoid any traffic really. Looks like I’m working! Boo.
ETA: My Recipe!!
Ingredients:
2 1/4 cups flour
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 cup brown sugar
1 cup shortening
2 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking soda
2 cups butterscotch chips
1. Mix shortening, sugar, brown sugar, vanilla, and eggs together.
2. Add in all other ingredients, butterscotch chips last. Mix well.
3. Spoon the dough onto cookie sheets.
4. Bake at 375 for 9-11 minutes.
Ta da! When I found this, it estimated 60 cookies, but I find that it’s closer to 42 or so. I made a double batch last night and came out with 84. It depends on how big you make them. Once I made them really big and thick and came out closer to 20-something…and they were just as good that way. One thing that bothers me is that they stick like crazy to my non-stick cookie sheet, but I think that’s my low-quality cookie sheet plus the oven. They’re fine on the other cookie sheet that I have…perfect, in fact. I think I’m going to make ANOTHER double batch for Thanksgiving and that time I’ll only use the good cookie sheet.
My Non-Post Post
Later today I might post my current expenses for the month, but right now I’m super tired…even after one Red Bull! Luckily, I have another one in a desk drawer, so maybe I’ll have it, too.
As an update to my last post, R got sick, so the movie was canceled (even though I wan’t going anyway), and she bowed out of the the Friday night dancing (making it easier for me, too). As far as the weekend? I’m at B’s on Saturday and I don’t know the plan for Sunday yet. Maybe we’ll see my family? No idea. We’ll see them on Thursday for Thanksgiving, regardless.
Finances-wise, remember the coat that I ordered from Victoria’s Secret? Well, I had an e-mail saying that the coat was discontinued, but they still sent the lip gloss and the free tote bag. I went on the site and found out that I could still get it in a size 6 (rather than a 6Tall), so I reordered it with the same lip gloss / tote bag deal. I really like the tote bag, too! It only has one inside pocket and one outside pocket, but it’s still pretty cool. Not $75 cool…and probably not something that I would have chosen for myself, but I like it. Unfortunately, I bet my mom wouldn’t like it and I was thinking of giving her the second one at Christmas. Maybe another friend. This also solves something for me: I didn’t have a black bag that I could use for work. I had a small bag that just looks beaten up and gross, and a large bag that I used when I was a teacher (but is far too big for this job where I never bring work home). This new tote bag is bigger than I would have preferred, but it’ll be great on days when I’m bringing more for lunch than usual, or want to carry a couple books around. Yay!
My coat should be arriving in less than two weeks! I no longer have to feel like a bum at Christmas!
My Problem Saying No
As any of you who often read this probably know, I have a problem with being too popular. Haha. Not really that, but I have friends that like to hang out together a lot and always want me there. I don’t quite get this because I can be a big pain, but whatever. I hate saying no to people, but I have to when it involves spending money that I don’t have…or money that should be used for other things. Here’s the situation I’m in:
1. Two of my friends and I have been trying to schedule a triple date; we were tentatively planning on Friday night, but had to wait to find out B’s schedule. He works late so we can’t. This was something I was looking forward to since my one friend suggested a BYOB game night to do things cheaply–my kind of gal!
2. My friend H e-mailed asking R and I if we wanted to go out dancing with some girls on Friday night; R said that we were waiting to find out about this triple date thing, but maybe. Now that we can’t do the triple date that night, this night is open. I hate clubbing AND dancing. It’s only fun if it’s for a bachelorette party or something and even then I don’t like staying long. To me, it’s expensive and not fun. Aside from R, I don’t want to hang out with these girls, either. The thing is, H is moving this weekend. She’s also requested help moving on Sunday. She also wants our Wednesday Night Dinner group to go to the James Bond movie tonight. I nixed that one right away. I don’t give a crap about James Bond or Daniel Craig as James Bond and I’m not paying $10 to stay up late before a big day at work tomorrow.
But how do I say no to everything? DC is freaking cold right now (I finally turned on the heat last night when I came home and my space heater said that my room was 48 degrees) and I’m not terribly excited at the prospect of going out in the cold on Friday night and having to worry about coat checking and all that on top of HATING CLUBBING. I know that this is like her last DC hurrah for a while, but really? She still works in Herndon. She’s going to be around for a little bit longer.
My brothers are coming into town on Friday night and I thought that B and I might go to my parents’ house to see them on Saturday, which I gave as an out for that day (hmm…should probably mention that to B). And now she also wants us to help her load a moving truck on Sunday? Helping wouldn’t be such a big deal if she didn’t live 30+ miles away from me already and didn’t want me to go clubbing on Friday night.
But I can’t keep saying no, can I? I said no to the triple date (regretfully, and not my fault). I said no to James Bond (gladly). At this point, I think that I can say no to ONE of the other things. If it came down to it, I guess I’d help with the truck loading. I don’t know, though. B and I haven’t talked about weekend plans yet, but I’m assuming that we’re going to see each other starting Saturday morning / afternoon. He’s not a big fan of H ever since I told him that she’d implied to me that he was full of crap when he said that he felt great after the Marine Corps Marathon. You may ask why on earth I told him that. Easy answer: beer. Had too much of it. Anyway, he’s definitely not going to want to do anything to help her out because he was VERY annoyed. And he already didn’t like her that much.
Anyway, this makes it hard to say no, when there are four proposed activities. Sucks.
My Bright Side
Now that it’s October and a new, fresh month, I’m going to start looking on the bright side of things. So even though I was stuck in traffic yesterday and my car stalled again, absolutely freaking me out, I still said a prayer for the people whose accident caused the back up and got over it.
When I found out that when R suggested pizza for dinner, she meant to ORDER pizza instead of getting large frozen pizzas for last night’s dinner at her house, I started to freak a little. This wasn’t in my budget and I only had $3 in cash, but I’d already agreed to it. I went home and found my hidden coin stash (which took a good ten minutes of searching) and among the rolled up coins ($24 was rolled up) was about $3.00 in loose quarters! Score! I decided that I’d use that, but remembered to ask R how much money each person was supposed to have gotten back from our beach trip in August. It turned out that the amount was $7 per person per night and $7 was my share of the pizza we ordered, so I didn’t spend anything last night. Granted, this was money that was owed to me that now I wouldn’t get back, but that’s okay. The big deal was that I didn’t have to pay out of this month’s budget. Also, we split three medium pizzas and cinnastix between four of us and I pretty much got one whole pizza minus a couple pieces that C ate. The three leftover pieces are in my fridge now, so I got exactly what I paid for, for once.
I really think that I can meet my goal of $2.50/day for food since I have so much in the fridge / freezer and pantry that I can eat before I need to go grocery shopping. Also, this is the average that I want to meet…if I have a day where I have Ramen for dinner, that’s just 20 cents…actually, it’s free for the first twelve meals since B bought a 12-pack for me last weekend. So there might be quite a few days when it only costs me a dollar or so for food. I’m looking forward to it.
While searching for the hidden coins, I found a few books that I can list on half.com, too! Yay!
Something else I just noticed recently is that my ankles aren’t swelling up like crazy each month. I pinned it as bad circulation or something to do with my time of the month, but I noticed that they didn’t swell up in August right after the beach. Could it be the relaxation from said beach? I doubt it. The only thing that I’ve done differently is lose weight. So was it bad circulation because of being almost overweight? I don’t know, but I’m glad that I don’t have to sleep with my feet propped up on pillows for a week each month. Awesome! More things to be happy about!
My Selfishness
I’ve been selfish recently. I’m not proud of it, nor am I very pleased with myself. Because groceries are one of the things that I’ve really been going over budget on, I’ve started seeing every meal for the dollar amount that it costs. This causes me to resent my wonderful boyfriend whenever he eats my food, and to resent my friends. I’ve been looking at this meal cooking every other Wednesday as a chore and something that I’ve been roped into. I’ve seen it as another drain on my money and my time. I’ve focused on the financial aspect to blame it on my friends expecting too much of me when the real problem is that I’m mad at myself. I resent me for not being able to say no. I resent me for not putting my foot down and give real reasons why I don’t want to do things. They’re ruling my life because I let them and it’s a hard cycle to break.
So I’m going to start doing things and looking at things differently. I’m going to happily invite my friends (including one friend that I wouldn’t have invited, but R mentioned that I was cooking tonight in front of her, so now I have to–which is only a problem because I feel like things need to be perfect, apartment clean, etc. for this friend where I wouldn’t have felt as pressured if it was just RC) and just look at this as an opportunity to do something nice for my friends. Yeah, it’s a hassle, but I’m just going to pretend to myself that it isn’t. What’s the worst that can happen if I ruin dinner? I have to heat up some frozen pizzas in the oven. There are worse things than that.
I’m also going to stop focusing on the prices of food that I buy once it’s been bought. When B eats half my food, I’m just going to be glad that he’s eating well for once. I’m also going to start loading up on Ramen noodles and soup fixings. My goal for October is to eat for less than $2/day, even if that means eating Ramen four or five times a week. Because I’m bad at sticking to goals, I’m going to post some October goals this week or next and spend the month trying to meet them. And actually update on them, too! We’ll see how this all goes.
My Mahi Mahi Must Wait
So I’m really glad that I decided to buy the peppers today and wait to thaw the fish when I got home because this morning I received an e-mail from R asking if it was all right if I came to their house for dinner, that she was going to cook a real meal, and our friend H would also be coming over.
What was I supposed to say to that? No, it’s not okay? I mean, at least this is an extra meal from them to me, but we’d agreed that we’d alternate each week and she made the decision to take my week without consulting me. What if I had the fish thawing in the fridge already? I would have had to go home, grill about 8 pounds of fish, complete with glaze and everything, package it up to be frozen, and then gone over to her house. And I doubt that I could have done it in the hour that I would have had between getting home and leaving for her place.
So I’m a bit annoyed about that, but I’m going to look on the bright side: 1) I won’t have to cook or clean, 2) free meal, 3) I have time to hit the library, 4) I have time to play Sims, probably, and 5) I can leave early and play Sims some more when I get home, maybe.
I swear, though, if she serves Honey Ginger Mahi Mahi, I’m going to freak out in my head a little.
My Mahi Mahi
It seems as though many PF bloggers also blog about food / diets / recipes, but I’ve been a little different. I blog about grocery shopping, frozen foods, and my diet, but I never include what I’m actually eating because I don’t want people to judge me for how unnutritious it all is (although I haven’t been sick in AGES–allergies don’t count–whereas the healthier eaters that I work with are sick a lot more often. One co-worker joked that all the preservatives in what I eat are preserving me).
Anyway, R suggested last week that we start cooking dinner for our Wednesday night get-togethers instead of simply drinking wine and snacking on what’s handy. I agreed, even though this works out better for her than me. Most of the time that we get together, her husband, C, comes, too (she and I have not hung out one-on-one since May, though we see each other once or twice a week); this means that I’m serving four extra dinners a month and RC are serving two extra a month.
Regardless of THAT, I agreed and I think that it’ll be a good way for me to try to learn to cook a little! I mean, I can cook a LITTLE, but I just never do it. I never try out new recipes because it’s easier to do the same old thing or pop in a frozen pizza than to go to such work. Also, I don’t keep many spices on hand.
It’s my turn to cook, though, and I want to prove that I’m not a complete doofus in the kitchen, so I want to make something that looks good…and tastes good. I’m a bit nervous trying this for the first time, but it sounds delicious.
Ginger Honey Grilled Mahi Mahi Fillets – Serves 4
1 1/2 lbs. mahi mahi fillets
1 cup honey
1 red bell pepper, seeded, cut into 2-inch strips
1 yellow bell pepper, seeded, cut into 2-inch strips
2 teaspoons ground ginger
How to cook:
1. Cut mahi mahi fillets into serving size pieces set aside.
2. Combine honey and ginger; use half of honey to coat mahi mahi fillets evenly.
3. Place on oiled grill over medium-hot coals (or burner in my case), basting frequently with honey mixture and turn once.
4. Coat bell peppers with remaining honey mixture and grill with fish until tender; turn peppers often to avoid burning.
5. Fish is done when it flakes easily when tested with a fork.
I’ll be making much more than that because I have a mess of mahi mahi (I caught it myself!) frozen together in a ziploc bag in my freezer that is several pounds more than the recipe calls for; I’ll freeze whatever is left individually for leftovers.
Egg Rice
Here’s the thing: the recipe calls for a cup of diced vegetables, but I like rice with just eggs, so I’ll be adjusting everything. It may turn out well or like crap, but I hate onions and don’t want them in my rice.
I’m using brown rice; I have a bag of it at home and I don’t know how much it calls for per serving. So, let’s say that it’s calling for two cups of rice:
2 cups brown rice
2 eggs
Olive oil
1. Cook brown rice normally; let it steam or whatever you’re supposed to do (I’ll read the directions)
2. Coat bottom of frying pan in olive oil; briefly consider that butter makes it tastier and hem and haw over the decision.
3. Transfer rice to frying pan, but heap it over to one side.
4. Break open two eggs on the empty side. Swirl around with a fork. When it starts getting more solid and less liquidy, mix in with the rice.
5. Put it on the plate.
This is where I might start frying more eggs because the eggier the rice is, the better.
So, yeah, this isn’t a clear recipe to follow, but it’s good enough for my friends and me. We’ll see how it all goes.
My 100th Post!
A group of friends are starting to plan a weekend trip to Busch Gardens in October, and I don’t particularly want to go.
I enjoy B.G., of course, and there’s talk of getting discounted tickets for about $16 lower than the normal price of $57/ticket. If it were only that, it wouldn’t be a big deal, but it’s never only that. There’s also eating within the park, gas to drive three hours to and from Williamsburg, eating at our friend’s parents’ house, alcohol, etc.
My friends are all great people and I enjoy hanging out with them in small doses, but they enjoy spending time as a group for entire weekends or weeks at a time. I’d rather get together for a day every month or two (everyone’s spread out from NYC to Richmond, VA and places in between) with half the group (6-7 people) rather than every month or two for a weekend/week with 12-15 people. I’m already “in trouble” (my words) because I don’t go to every event. For 2008 alone, the group will have gotten together for:
A week at New Years
A weekend at the end of February (except that people cancelled at the last minute, so only one pal came…and we had a fun time for the one night).
A weekend in April around my birthday and my best friends’ housewarming party
4th of July (4-5 day weekend)
Middle August beach week
Busch Gardens weekend in October
And plans are for another New Years already. I did not attend New Years this year, nor will I this winter, either, because B and I always go to Vermont. I didn’t attend the 4th of July thing because of a cousin’s wedding, and I only did a single day at the August beach week.
It’s hard for me to say no to an event because I know that people will be annoyed with me. I don’t refuse because I don’t like them or don’t want to see them, but because it’s too much of a time commitment or a financial commitment. I can’t just say, “Sorry guys, can’t make it to this one. I’ll try again some other time,” because a few of the group want to know why. They determine whether it’s a good excuse depending on the reason I give.
For my cousin’s wedding, I’m pretty sure I replied all to the original e-mail and said exactly why I couldn’t be there, a good month in advance. A couple weeks later one friend messaged me and asked if I’d be able to go. I said no, and explained again that my cousin was getting married.
“Oh, I figured,” she replied. This ruffled my feathers. She FIGURED that I’d be at my cousin’s wedding? I know this girl is really sweet normally and and wasn’t trying to upset me, but she did. I wish that I could talk to my best friend about this, but R has turned into one of THEM.
If I choose not to partake in one of their “events”, I’m the bad guy who puts other people/things before them. I’ve witnessed them complain about other friends who say no to these events for one reason or another until they make it sound like the absent party is doing this on purpose to hurt them.
All I can hope in the future is that family events come up to coincide with the friend events that I don’t want to go to…like I’m hoping my cousin will schedule her new baby’s baptism on this Busch Gardens weekend. I just can’t afford a weekend like that right now.
On a happier, less whiny note, this is my 100th post! This is exciting for me because I usually lose interest in most projects that I start, but this one is going strong. Thanks to all of you who read and are interested in my little financial highs and lows.
